The Key to Self-Love
The #WickedWednesday newsletter is inspired by my desire to share stories focused on promoting community and creating positive change, something we all need more of nowadays.
Something you should know about me is I love romcoms. I think they are the most hopeful movie genre out there. Give me a meet cute, some drama and big romantic gestures and I'm a happy camper.
Where romcoms go wrong, in my opinion, is they don't often teach us that it's ok if the girl doesn't get the boy or vice versa. At the end of the day, Hollywood wants to wrap things in a neat little bow and make you feel good.
Whether you get the Hollywood "happy ending" or not, there is a much large lesson to learn and that's the importance of self-love.
Now I hate the quote "you have to love yourself before you can love someone else" because I think that self-love is a journey and you're not going to magically wake up and be "healed" one day, and yet there is value in getting to know yourself no matter what stage you are at in life (yes, I saw "Anyone but You" recently and I'm going to declare romcoms are back, baby).
So whether you celebrate Galentine's Day, Valentine's Day, anti-Valentine's Day, or a combination, I invite you to learn how to practice self-love, artsy style, and maybe even borrow some of ideas for yourself.
What is self-love, anyways?
"Self-love means that you have an appreciation, affinity, and positive regard for yourself. It’s closely related to self-esteem and self-compassion. When you have a strong sense of self-love, you understand your own value and treat yourself in a loving way." (Source: Better Up)
Also, look at this beautiful rainbow self-love wheel!
It's very important to distinguish self-love from narcissism: "Unlike narcissism, which is excessive self-absorption and self-interest, self-love is a positive trait. Loving yourself means having a good understanding of both your strengths and weaknesses. Narcissism is generally associated with poor mental health. But high self-love has a positive effect on your well-being, mental fitness, and your relationships." (Source: Better Up)
What about self-care?
"The key difference between self-care and self-love is that self-care is the actions and practices you take to develop or enhance your self-love. Self-care is more action-based, while self-love is more of a mental and emotional state regarding how you feel about yourself.
Acts of self-care help support and lead to self-love. Self-love is the most important feeling you can have. Self-love is a foundational component of mental health. Together self-care and self-love help support your resiliency, stress management, and mental health when dealing with the stresses of everyday life and hard times." (Source: The Ripple)
Important (self-love themed) content
I wrote an article for Jewish Women's Archive a few years ago that is super fun and filled with tips on how to practice radical self-love. (Warning: NSFW)
My sister-in-law, writer, coach and self-love expert, Sasha Cagen, was on my podcast a few years ago. She also is about to go on her second excursion to Bali in the past six months, the first of which was a present to herself for her 50th birthday -- talk about self-love!
Over a Third of LGBTQ+ Youth Do Not Believe They Will Live Past 35
(Warning: suicide)"If you talk with an LGBTQ+ young person and they say that they have a low perceived life expectancy, in this case meaning they don't believe that they're going to live past 35, or low levels of life purpose, that might signal that this person could be struggling with their mental health or suicidality. So, instead of having to ask a young person who's queer whether or not they attempted suicide in the last year, or if they're planning on attempting suicide, an alternative could be asking them about their perceived life expectancy and life purpose." If you need someone to talk to, The 988 Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals in the United States.
Call for International Women's Day Events
International Women's Day (March 8) is just around the corner and this year's theme is "Inspire Inclusion." I'm particularly excited by the emphasis on unleashing your creativity! Check out this awesome spoken word poem (yay more poetry!) written by highly talented and accomplished spoken word poet Sharena Lee Satti on what it means to #InspireInclusion.
Please send any Massachusetts International Women's Day events to rachaeldubinsky@gmail.com by February 23.
In conclusion, I hope this edition of #WickedWednesdays gave you some good ideas on how to practice self-love, which is critical to our overall well-being.
Got feel good stories to share for future #WickedWednesdays? Visit wickwriters.com, post a comment below or drop me a line at rachaeldubinsky@gmail.com.
Until next week, stay #wicked.